You Are My Punshine
by knives4cash
Summary: Yang Xiao Long and Sun Wukong vie for absolute affection from Blake Belladonna. Or do they? Hilarity and feels ensue. Happy New Years!


Part thirty-nine of my RWBY series "Pollination: The Bumblebee and White Rose"

* * *

A single bird unleashes a horrible chirp, echoing across the plain. I glance up from my book. It's somewhere out there.

Just because I can't see you, vile creature, doesn't mean I won't be able to rip you limb from li-

"Hey." Yang gently nudges my shoulder.

I look to my right. Leaning back against the park bench, she's giving me that smug smirk. "Yes?"

"You were doing it again." She explains with just a hint of a giggle.

Quickly, Blake! You must engage in the art of deception, for if not you shall surely be discovered; and the element of surprise shall be lost! "Was there a bird? I didn't notice." I quickly declare and turn back to my book. Brilliant. There's no way she'll be able to-

She places her right hand over my left breast.

I look back up at her. "Wha-?"

Her smirk breaks out into a grin. "Your heart's racing, kitty cat." She observes and withdraws her hand. "Liar, liar. Sexy pants on fire." She murmurs as she uses her hand to scratch my faunus ears.

I bat her hand away. "Not fair." I grumble. Sometimes, a pout is the only way to convey discouragement.

"Really now?" She sits up straight and turns to face me. Raising an eyebrow, she continues, "Coming from the girl who can sense my aura and smell me from a mile away?"

A pause. A brief, icy glare pause.

"I hate you."

She leans over and pecks me on the lips. "I love you too, kitty cat."

"You two have the weirdest chemistry I've ever seen." A familiar voice observes. That voice happens to belong to Sun Wukong, who has chosen this moment to slide me into the center of the park bench, inadvertently... or deliberately pushing Yang off onto the ground.

"ACK!"

In his hand is a single red rose, and on his face is a seductive smirk. "Hey." He breathes. It smells of honey. "You have options." He murmurs, offering the rose to me.

"And those options!" Yang rockets back up from the ground and pushes me back to the left, pushing Sun off of the bench. "Are as stupid as your face!" She exclaims, offering me an entire rose bush. I see a massive hole in the garden patch that runs along the building. She pulled that up from the school's garden.

I groan, pinching the bridge of my nose. She's already getting frowny-face stickers on her work. At this rate, she'll be expelled.

"Not as stupid!" He jumps back with a box of chocolates to reinforce his rose. "As your stupid puns!"

She freezes, dropping the rose bush at her feet.

The warm summer breeze gently blows a tumbleweed across the walkway.

She pulls out her Scroll and begins to phone someone. "This is Agent Goldilocks!" Yang screams as she huddles down against her end of the park bench. Desperately loading her gauntlets, she requests, "I'm gonna need the maid costume and a coffin!" How peculiar. Yang hardly ever reacts with such hostility. Many have hit on me before, and she's never taken it this personally.

"Yang, what did I tell you about guys who like what they see?" Weiss's voice groans through her Scroll in response.

Yang leaps over me and starts pulling shotgun punches at a now panicked and rapidly apologizing faunus monkey. "Scratch that! Make it a jam jar!"

"Is this what you have to put up with?!" Sun screams as he begins to deflect my girlfriend's shots with his... nunchuck guns? "I don't know what you see in her!"

"Are you blind?!" she shouts back, continuing to bounce and leap about. "Natural blonde! Mile-long legs! And double Ds!"

I'm not sure if it's the last remark or the copious amount of gunfire that have begun to finally attract a crowd, but the students are beginning to gather now.

"What could she NOT see?!" She demands.

I close my book. I'm clearly not going to get any reading done today. Besides, I think I've figured out this little ruse. "There is nothing more deceptive than an obvious fact." I observe as I rise from my seat.

The two blondes stop, Sun in the middle of reloading his weapons and Yang in the middle of striking a ridiculous pose.

"Yang." I stride towards her and inquire, "Is it possible that you wanted to 'advertise' your qualities to me?"

I sense her aura flare, ever so briefly before she represses it again.

Good, but not good enough.

"N-no! Of course not!" She immediately crosses her arms and declares, "I resent that!"

Sun begins to slowly back away while failing to mask his grin.

I jam my hand against her left breast, much to her surprise and arousal. "I thought so." Her heart is racing. "Liar, liar." I taunt, bringing up a smirk of my own.

"Cheater!" she yells, leaping away from me. Sun bursts out laughing.

"The jig is up." I declare, pointing an accusatory finger at her. "You orchestrated this encounter to secure your position in my life!"

The small crowd that has gathered 'round us gasps in shock.

Yang stomps her boot on the ground. "And I would've gotten away with it too!" She turns her attention towards Sun. "If it hadn't been for YOUR sub par acting!"

He laughs. "Whatever, blondie! You already payed me in advance!" He turns his back on us and begins to walk away. "It's not as if you were in any danger to begin with!"

She growls and readies her gauntlets, intending to go after him for with sincerity. Luckily, she has me to hold her back in these would-be lawsuit scenarios.

"Yang." I place a hand on her shoulder. She stops and looks back at me. "What brought this on?" I wonder aloud. "Did you think I would dump you?"

She falters. "I- Well, it's just." She groans, waving her hands in front of her face, desperately trying to find words suitable for her passion.

I pull her into a hug. "Shh." I whisper to her, patting her on the back. "Take your time." I tell her. "Breathe."

She draws a deep breath and slowly exhales. "You're the first one to accept me." She murmurs.

"That's not true." I smile and continue to pat her back. "What about Weiss? What about Team JNPR? What about everyone else in Beacon?" She's hardly alone. If anything, she lives in a place where everyone knows her name.

I can feel her shaking her head. "I mean romantically, Blake." Oh. Coming from her, this is a surprise. "You're the first one to even think of tolerating me in a romantically involved relationship." She pulls away and looks me in the eyes. "For the longest time, Ruby and I were the outcasts." She weakly laughs as she diverts her gaze to the ground. "And then we came here."

"Confound it, Yang." I growl as I pull her back into a hug. This time, I hold her in a deadlock. "You have nothing to fear."

"Promise?" She whispers.

Without pause. "I promise."

I feel as if a moment of content silence would be the appropriate scene to follow.

However, a sudden roar of cheer and applause from a now moderate sized crowd erupts.

* * *

A/N: I really don't like to write angst material for such a fun universe; but this one, like all the others, wrote itself.

Anyways, I did not receive a singly PM concerning my whereabouts. I'm glad you people understand that even I require a break now and then.


End file.
